Pinch Me: Barenaked Ladies

With apologies to everyone on the planet who suffers from narcolepsy, but, really, how could I not?
Also one of the greatest air-bass songs ever composed.

It’s the perfect time of year, Somewhere far away from here
I feel fine enough, I guess, Considering everything’s a mess
There’s a restaurant down the street, Where hungry people like to eat
I could walk but I’ll just drive, It’s colder than it looks outside
Like a dream you try to remember but it’s gone
Then you try to scream but it only comes out as a yawn, when you
try to see the world, beyond your front door
Take your time, is the way I rhyme gonna make you smile
When you realize that a guy my size might take a while
Just to try to figure out what all this is for
It’s the perfect time of day, To throw all your cares away
Put the sprinkler on the lawn, And run through with my gym shorts on
Take a drink right from the hose, And change into some dryer clothes
Climb the stairs up to my room, Sleep away the afternoon
Pinch me, pinch me, I’m still asleep
Please God, tell me, I’m still asleep
On an evening such as this, It’s hard to tell if I exist
If I pack the car and leave this town, Who’ll notice that I’m not around
I could hide out under there, I just made you say “underwear”
I could leave but I’ll just stay, All my stuff’s here anyway